Good Grape Wine Company

May 18 2006

Snobs Strike a Death Blow against the Wine Proletariat

Wine aficionados around the world now have theirproverbial crosses to use against the middle wine consumer acting as vampiresto the wine tradition.

I introduce to you the Winesceptre.

Somewhere in betweena lot of form, and marginal function lies this beauty that is designed to servewine at optimum temperature. A blurb fromthe web site that can befound here:

Invented by a restaurant owner in Europe, the Winesceptreis an innovative and simple way to maintain the optimal temperature of apre-chilled bottle after it has been opened and while it is being served at thetable. Sommeliers and fine restaurants worldwide take great pride in the careof fine wines. Wines are kept in special wine refrigerators to maintain theirideal serving temperatures. Much of this effort is wasted as the wines are putin ice buckets causing their temperature to drop dramatically and the wine tolose its bouquet.

 After approximately three hours in the freezer, theWinesceptre is ready for use: Pour a small amount of wine into a glass to create space; remove the Winesceptre from the stainless tubeand, with a slight pressure, insert it into the top of a pre-chilled bottle of wine. The o-rings hold theWinesceptre securely in the bottle. Pour your wine through the top of the Winesceptre and enjoy.

The coup de grace for this absurdist wine accessory--priced at $119.99 no less--is the fact that it comes with different finials or toppers and a level of scientific evidence on the warmth through which unwashed americans drink their wine.

Here stateside, Todd English, a chef turned gourmet pitchman that aspires to Wolfgang Puck levels of whoredom, pimps this on HSN--where, apparently it has sold out on numerous occasions. 

Overall, I lump this baby into the same category as the countertop chocolate fountains, mini vegetable choppers and Popeil Pasta & Sausage maker as something that will absolutely never get used and costs too much.  I checked the demographics for HSN, and over 75% of the purchasers are woman with a househould income of $61,000.

Ahem, let me add that $120 wine chilling systems are more likely to be used with Charles Shaw here then a Screaming Eagle, for example.

So, instead of striking a blow against the proletariat, perhaps, some marketers are taking advantage of the masses.

I would say that Todd English should be ashamed, but his $40 plates of high grade Houlihan’s fare at the Disney resort in FLA has effectively already done that for me. 

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